How to understand that a man loves you. How to determine the sexuality of a man by external signs
Relationships between guys and girls don't always go smoothly. Each of us often becomes a witness, and even a participant in the quarrel of a young couple, who, in fact, could live without conflict. But is it possible? The answer lies in the need for mutual understanding. In this article, we will focus on the beautiful half of humanity and talk about how they learn to understand their men.
How to understand a guy if he doesn't even listen to me?
First of all, you need to understand for yourself that each person is unique and requires a personal approach to conversation and interaction. Of course, looking for different approaches to people may seem difficult, but this is the only way to build quality and trusting relationships not only with a guy, but also with girlfriends or parents.
Here are some tips to help you understand your young man:
- Remember that the person in front of you has his own personal qualities and pursues his own goals in a relationship. Realizing and understanding this will bring you closer to understanding your loved one. Many girls make the mistake of believing that their boyfriend thinks only about them day and night and builds all his plans for his lady of the heart. This big delusion leads to resentment and, in the end, to the end of the relationship. Remember! Every person strives for what his soul really desires. And, unfortunately or fortunately, it may not be you.
- It is known that women, having a sensitive intuition, tend to feel their partner, and not analyze his actions from a rational point of view. Often it is this female feature leads to conflict and misunderstanding. Girls tend to come up with numerous reasons for the gloomy mood or unbridled joy of their man, suffering from the cooling of his feelings or imagining him in the arms of his mistress. All this is just a figment of the lady's imagination, which, unfortunately, often replaces reality. Therefore, before inventing anything, it is better to simply ask your man about the reasons for his behavior.
- Pay attention to your own feelings, sensations and emotions while communicating with your boyfriend. You will surely notice: if you are sad, then it will seem to you that he should be sad too. If he is not upset at all, then a feeling of resentment and aggression may appear, which ultimately will lead to a well-known result. It is very important to be able not to transfer your emotions and feelings to another person. The winning strategy is this: if you are depressed and upset, then try to use your boyfriend's positive energy in order to improve your mood. If, on the contrary, you experience feelings of joy, harmony and tranquility, try to convey them to your soulmate. Such a sensitive relationship, even only on your part, will give a good result, and in the future you will be able to understand your boyfriend perfectly.
Simple rules when communicating with your boyfriend:
- Never rush a relationship. Remember! Everything has its time.
- Do not demand constant attention from a person. Each of us has many worries and concerns that simply cannot be ignored.
- Save your warmth and kindness for your boyfriend. This is what makes a man feel the joy of every meeting with you.
- Never let your feelings hurt. Protect yourself first of all.
Men and women… From time immemorial, we have been living side by side, but we have not learned to perceive each other in the way that peaceful coexistence requires. Male psychology - how to understand a man to a woman with her own, female psychology? The eternal confrontation, the eternal dispute of the sexes, the eternal struggle. Perhaps, it cannot be otherwise - there is an opinion that men and women are “from different planets”.
It seems that this is so, because almost every one of us once realizes that a man cannot be understood with the mind. That is why it is very difficult to establish personal or business contact with him. Hence - quarrels, conflicts, tensions in relationships. Hence - unhappy marriages, dissatisfaction, hostility, broken hearts and loneliness. And how to understand a man or a guy, general psychology does not tell.
However, the point, most likely, is not that we women come from Venus. And they, men, are from Mars. The reason for the disagreement between the sexes is the difference in worldviews and differences in the perception of reality. If we are aware of these features of male perception, then we will surely be able to find a key to the representatives of the stronger sex.
And we will bypass, thanks to this, sharp corners in relations, eliminating the lion's share of quarrels and misunderstandings. Women are wise creatures. They are able to subtly feel and understand their loved ones well. But only if they have an idea of what it is male psychology. Otherwise, we become touchy, excessively demanding, unbearable.
Yes, you can’t understand a man with your mind if you don’t know how he thinks and what he means when he utters this or that phrase. Ignorance in this matter gives rise to a lot of conflicts and leads to continuous misunderstandings in communication with loved ones. So let's at least partially eliminate the gap in our knowledge of male psychology and try to understand a man. Shall we start?
The language of men
Oddly enough, but even when a man and a woman use the same dialect in life, they still speak different languages. According to linguistic researchers, in ancient times, both sexes were well aware of this. As a result, they understood each other very well. However, over time, both of them either forgot about linguistic differences, or ceased to reckon with them.
However, this situation is not observed everywhere today. For example, in Japan, such a linguistic difference is provided not only by grammatical rules, but also by the requirements of etiquette. However, it is not only about declensions, pronouns, endings, prefixes and suffixes. The point, first of all, is that men and women express their opinions and feelings differently. It's easy to make sure. It is enough to ask the boy and the girl to retell a fairy tale. And immediately there will be a big difference between the “girlish” and “boyish” options. It's simple - their psychology, even in childhood, is already different!
Maybe this is laid in early childhood, because we raise our children in accordance with their gender? But it is also likely that the roots of the differences are in the characteristics of the psyche and genetic memory. It's hard to say exactly. The fact remains that we speak different languages.
And if male and female tongue taught at school in sex education classes, many conflicts between men and women could have been avoided, because it would be much easier to understand a man. But, alas, at such lessons now they teach anything, even virtuoso sex, but not the skill of communicating with the opposite sex.
As a result, each person comprehends the science of such communication independently by trial, error and stuffing cones. Yes, it’s good if he wants to comprehend, otherwise he doesn’t, he doesn’t want to! And all his life he steps on the same rake, getting hit on the forehead again and again. And then, when he gets tired of stomping on the rake, he either closes up or begins to have a negative attitude towards all, without exception, representatives of the opposite sex. Like, they are all such and such, so there can be no mutual understanding!
If for men the main thing is external action, then for women it is the inner world of emotions. So how then can we express our thoughts and feelings in the same way? As he contemplates how to prevent a world upheaval, she puzzles over what to make for dinner. While he thinks about the consequences of the revolution in some country, she is looking for options to lose weight. He was puzzled by the global crisis, she was puzzled by a new fur coat, and so on. Women generally think more narrowly and concretely than men. Men may not notice scattered socks, dirty cups, cobwebs in the corner, women see all this at once, without straining their attention. And, without straining their thinking, they already know what to do with such a disgrace.
Conclusion: if the mind does not understand a man, then it is impossible for men and women to project their own worldview onto each other. These are views on reality from different angles, coinciding only at some points.
Psychologically, we are not similar, so do not be disappointed, taking such dissimilarity for unwillingness to understand and fruitfully build relationships. It is better to take into account that men are not like us, and adjust our behavior accordingly. And as long as male psychology remains a mystery to you, you simply cannot understand it, with all your desire. Let's see what it looks like.
Men's phrases. How to treat them?
We are all great inventors and tend to invent almost every line thrown by our loved ones. For example, he returned home from work in a bad mood, had dinner, gloomily threw: “I'm tired!” and collapsed on the couch in front of the TV. As he mindlessly flips channels, a whole armada of disturbing thoughts swirls through our heads.
Tired?! Why tired? He was not promoted in his position, he no longer earns money, he spends as much time in the service as before. So why is he suddenly so tired today? Uh, nooo, a scoundrel, either he is hiding something from his salary and does not say that his workload has been increased along with his salary, or he has got a mistress ...
And we also perceive the phrase "I'm tired!" like he's tired of us. After all, we have gained almost a kilogram over the past six months and have not cooked borscht for a long time. Didn't cook borscht?! Yeaaaa?! And the fact that we also work and carry the whole house on ourselves does not count?!
Everything. It is worth thinking out in this way an innocent phrase of your dear half - and off we go, off we go: such is female psychology. An attack on the spouse begins in order to find out for what reasons he silently wallows on the couch and what does not suit him at home. The same can only be surprised and wonder what caused the dearest little wife such a surge of aggression. After all, he was really tired. The day has been tough!
Men tend to be straight forward. They themselves do not know how to hint, and they do not understand hints. It is we women who can circle around the bush, come from afar, express ourselves ambiguously. And then to be offended that they didn’t perceive us as they should, didn’t guess the request and didn’t satisfy the desire. And to sort things out with her husband who was blown away by an unexpected attack. After all, he didn’t even suspect that when we asked: “Am I a little better, dear?”, We meant that the figure was perfectly preserved! And he foolishly threw: “Yes!”
You should not try with all your might to get information out of a man. We pester them all the time with the question of what you have at work, where you have been, we are waiting for them to confirm their feelings and assurances of their own attractiveness. In response, we get indifferent: “Everything is in order”, “Went on business”, “I love you”, “You look great”.
And we begin to rage from the cold, detached intonation of the answers. But what else can it be if the thoughts of the dear are busy solving a global problem and he is not up to trifles? Well, he loves, he loves, how much can you talk about it ?! All fine. There will be problems, he will tell. And we look quite ourselves. This is understandable, otherwise he would have fled a long time ago! Why bother with such questions again and again? That's what it is, male psychology!
The main part of women, for unknown reasons, for some reason, suspect their faithful of excessive secrecy. They supposedly never tell the truth, hide even the little things and generally pretend at every turn. Of course, we are trying to expose them, to bring them to clean water and force them to be sincere. Men begin to get nervous and angry, thereby increasing our suspicion. Still would! After all, if he freaks out, it means that he has touched a nerve, and he is definitely to blame for something!
Now let's imagine such a situation. A buyer in a manufactured goods store pestered the seller with a request to sell him a sausage. The salesman, amazed, replies that they don't have any sausages for sale. The visitor does not calm down and continues to insist on his own - sell him a pound of amateur sausage, period! And she doesn’t want to believe that she simply isn’t here. How, as a result, will the seller begin to react to his persistence? Correctly. In the end, he will lose his temper and show the bore where the exit is.
This is what our attempts to convict a man of insincerity look like when he has nothing to hide. What kind of reaction can be expected from someone who is offended by distrust? Well, the representatives of the stronger sex do not know how to discuss every little thing, because they do not notice the little things! They do not understand why it is necessary to ardently confess one's love every hour, if this ardent confession has already sounded. Still, it's so clear, why repeat something a hundred times?
Women, of course, like to listen to the phrase "I love you", and they are ready to listen to it again and again. However, men pronounce it from the bottom of their hearts only in moments of spiritual uplift. If we demand recognition several times a day, they simply give in so as not to provoke a spouse into a scandal. This alone is proof of male love. Would a husband, in the absence of love, seek to preserve peace in the family?
Well, since he loves, it means that extra pounds don’t spoil us, and we won’t hear about troubles at work once again. And about what cases he decided when he was absent, we will not know. because loving man once again he will not upset his woman and will try to cope with all the questions himself - this is precisely the psychology of a real knight.
From the point of view of representatives of the strong half of humanity, a woman should not know about their problems. Does she meddle in her husband's affairs? It turns out that he does not believe in his male viability. Only a fit infantile squishy will put up with this, who is just waiting for his wife to take over the solution of all issues.
In a word, if we cannot understand a man with the mind, we will act according to worldly wisdom. Has he stopped complimenting and confessing his love, unshaven lounging on the couch and scratching his growing tummy? Wife should be happy! Because she is the only one whom her husband completely trusts and with whom he really feels good. Otherwise, I would not be lying here, but wandering somewhere in search of adventure. Or lovers.
In general, the psychology of men is quite understandable. He calls yellow yellow and blue blue. We can define yellow as the color of young dandelions, and replace blue with the color of the endless sea. Men will not confuse precise definition with emotion. They save both internal reserve and time. Don't worry about it, because we all mean the same thing. Let's try to understand a loved one without further ado, paying more attention to his actions. They will tell about feelings better than any, even the most beautiful phrases.
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cool
I want to be loved or understood, which is the same.
Vitina von Arnim
When this guy appeared in your life, you realized that this is real adult life. And you immediately felt that this is the very love that you read and dreamed about. And you - it's definitely forever, and you're sure of it ...
More precisely, I was sure, until I began to notice that your ideal boyfriend was not behaving at all ideally and that his behavior was more and more at odds with your dreams. And sometimes it can be so offensive that there is no strength to hold back the insult, the quarrel.
And after another conflict, you decide, you need to learn to understand the guy so that the relationship will again become like at the beginning.
The fact that it is a difficult matter to understand a guy, a man is not just the following example, but the story of a lifetime:
For forty-eight years I lived with Lev Nikolaevich, but I never found out what kind of person he was ...
Sofia Andreevna, wife of Leo Tolstoy
From the diary of Leo Tolstoy: “... I am in love, as I did not believe that it was possible to love” - he even complained at first that family happiness absorbs him so much that it interferes with activities outside the family. During family life he was repeatedly on the verge of suicide, his wife, Sofya Andreevna, had several incomplete suicide attempts.
Lev Nikolaevich and Sofya Andreevna lived together for almost half a century, gave birth to thirteen children, but could not understand each other. So let's start with the easy to understand loved one, and then we move on to the meaningful, this is when understanding is on the verge of the impossible, as in the marriage of L.N. and S.A. Tolstykh, or when understanding becomes mutual joy, regardless of the years lived.
Simple rules "how to understand a guy."
The big mistake of a girl in understanding a guy is to completely rely on her assumptions, worse than fantasy and dreams: “Well, can he really not understand this himself ...? It's obvious, after all." This is obvious only to you, and the other person is another state. Therefore, when you try to state your problem with hints, insults, outbursts of discontent, there is a high probability that it will be misunderstood.
In a relationship, it is important that not only you understand the guy, but he understands you. And for this you need specific communication, when both of you speak clearly, pose a question and get the same clear answer. At the same time, the more you specify the topic, the fewer mistakes in mutual understanding will be.
Dialogue is to love what blood is to the body. When the blood flow stops, the body dies. When dialogue stops, love fades, and hatred and rejection of each other emerge. But dialogue can also restore a faded connection. This is the real miracle of dialogue.
Riwell Howe. "The Miracle of Dialogue"
There are no winners and losers in a dialogue - only winners. In dialogue, we will never become anything less than what we were, but only more. To live in dialogue with another means to live doubly.
It’s easier to understand a guy when you rely not only on his words, but also on deeds and deeds. Actions speak louder than words about his position and plans. After all, words can hide both misunderstanding and cunning.
For example, a guy talks about his unearthly love for you. Look, pretty words are always nice. But, at the same time, watch, is he ready to give up meeting friends for you? Does he call you himself or only answer your calls? Is he ready to help you in some business, despite the fatigue? Did he introduce you as his girlfriend to friends and family? If you answer negatively to all these questions, then his beautiful words are not expensive. He says them for some purpose, but they are not true.
Several letters came to the Club with the question: “An unfamiliar young man called me “beauty”, what would that mean?” This episode has no predictive signs for the future, there is a sign that the guy knows how to make compliments and make new acquaintances.
There are silent people who find it difficult to talk about their feelings, but this does not mean at all that they do not exist. At the same time, a guy who endlessly showers you with compliments can be completely indifferent to you. Such a difference in behavior is more a characteristic of the guy's psychotype than his attitude towards you. Therefore, it is best not to immediately take to heart what the guy is broadcasting, judging by his actions, they will say much more than the most romantic compliments.
Another serious source of complicating mutual understanding. At a young age, there is disharmony in the leading amorous - erotic desires and inclinations of a girl and a guy. If a girl is interested in romantic manifestations, compliments, poems, flowers, gifts, dances, hugs, kisses. That guy is primarily interested in bodily contact relationships, a bed with penetration and completion. Guys have a libido more sex oriented than romance like girls. Therefore, in each pair, the girl and the guy must individually decide how to relate to this disharmony. And if a guy, more often than you would like, persuades you to continue in bed, this is not a sign of his strong sexual constitution, but is an age-related sexual feature. After the wedding, when the bed becomes a regular event, the husband's sex drive is largely transformed and not always in a desirable direction for the wife. By the way, you can find out the strong, medium or weak sexual constitution of you and your boyfriend right now.
Naturally, for your future harmonious relationship, it will be better if these types match.
23% of Russians have married their “first love”. The proportion of such respondents increases from 7% among 18-24 year olds to 34% among those aged 60+
The fat juror recalls that at the age of twenty he “fell head over heels in love” with his wife Natasha: “Now I would gladly whip myself for an early marriage, but then I don’t know what would have happened to me if Natasha had refused me . Love was real, such as they describe in novels, mad, passionate, and so on.
Chekhov, A.P. "Strong Feelings"
And now from simple tips "how to understand a guy" let's move on to more depth of the topic.
You need to know that there are relationships in which understanding a guy, a man, any other person is work, and there are relationships where understanding is a joy.
The phrase "Happiness is when you are understood" from the movie "Let's Live Until Monday" became popular. It can be understood with the mind, this is when one person explains to another how he solved a difficult everyday problem, but it can be understood with the soul, this is when one person empathizes with another, when the first needs to solve a difficult task, and the experiences of the second are no less deep than those of the first, more than that. the second joined in the experience before the first.
To understand is to feel.
K. Stanislavsky
The highest degree of understanding of a person by a person is the possibility of anticipating his expectations. These are actions that are subjectively perceived by the other partner as preceding the realization of the corresponding need. This clearly shows the role of the intuition of the understanding partner, his ability to empathy, empathy. And it can be assumed that the hero of the film meant precisely the second form of experience - empathy, just a high school student does not yet know this term and concept. So, only a dual is capable of empathy and even anticipatory empathy.
Love is the only way to understand another person in the deepest essence of his personality.
V. E. Frankl
From this statement and what is given in the epigraph, it follows that spiritual understanding is an indispensable element of love. Of these, it is only not clear that love comes first, then understanding, or vice versa. Socionics will help us answer this important question.
Socionics is the only one of the psychological sciences that suggests the best psychotypes, from which spiritual, and therefore mutually understanding family unions are formed, as well as combinations in which it is better not to do this.
There is such an aphorism: "Love cannot be found, it can only be met", socionics suggests that path, following which the probability of meeting love increases many times.
Nature has taken care and created an ideal marriage partner for each person, but it has complicated the path for finding him so much that a minority of people manage to do this without special knowledge.
When understanding a guy, a husband is a joy.
Duals are people with best compatibility, only between them and can exist real love, means mutual understanding, the dual is a source of only a supportive, encouraging mood.
F.M. Dostoevsky is beautiful, wise saying: “To love means to see a person as God intended them”, and so the duals see each other as God intended them. Of course, if you wish, you can find something destructive, dark in every person, but in a dual pair there is an abundance of positive, therefore, why look for tar in a barrel of honey? Although masochists and neurotics, who are not so few, gravitate towards this, but this is already a different view of the phenomenon and problems.
And here are some excerpts about the relationship of duals from the articles of professional socionics.
"In a word, the dual is really the same "half" that every socionic dreams of meeting (a socionic cannot dream, because it is impossible to dream about what you have no idea about!). In the current dual dyad, people generally forget about, for example, what complexes are. No complexes! Duals are liberated, uninhibited, confident in their demand, in their need, in their usefulness (first of all, to the dual, and therefore to society)
The fact that for one of the duals is a revelation, for the second one is an ordinary behavioral reaction, almost spontaneous. Everything can be said, everything can be asked, the feeling of shame, embarrassment disappears, you can literally be naked - spiritually and (or) physically - and this will not seem strange or uncomfortable.
"We need duality, subconsciously expect and persistently seek, and when we find it, we are surprised. What happens to us? We become different: more confident, more cheerful, kinder, more responsive, stronger, in a word, better, and life - emotionally brighter and intellectually richer. All secret fears, doubts, anxieties disappear. We find ourselves - true. We understand what comfort means - both external and internal, that the main thing is the comfort of the soul. Where does this comfort come from? In the satisfaction of needs. We all want something, we we are looking for support, understanding, evaluation of our knowledge, efforts and skills.We want to be useful.And only the dual - a mentally complementary partner - will protect, support and help in everything, and only this person will correctly evaluate our help, because it is precisely these skills that are needed ".
"Each participant "sees" the event on the one hand -" with his own eyes ", and on the other - with the eyes of the dual. Both have a common (and identical) three-dimensional mental representation of the event, which gives the person a sense of joy, confidence and peace of mind (comfort) That's what makes dual relationships so good.
How does the dualization process start? It all starts with the fact that the duals "suddenly fall into the rhythm of the same uneven breathing" (the words of the unforgettable V.S. Vysotsky, "The Ballad of Love"). They suddenly find themselves "beeping" in sync, in the same rhythm, no matter what aspect it starts from. Such mutual rhythm pleases.
Then the natural (innate) competence of each in terms of aspects of "quadra values" (that which is certainly interesting and significant) is revealed. This is of interest.
Then - the transmission and assimilation of adequate amounts of intellectual information (if we call intelligence the amount of conscious memory and the speed of conscious access to it). Here, the throughput in receiving and issuing information is limited by prejudices and prejudices.
How do people with complementary psyches perceive each other? As the most "humane" person, the most gentle, humane, accessible, sympathetic. That is what he is. In addition, this is a partner who always knows what and when to do, how to answer, what to advise, what kind of joke to dispel tension. Who understands everything, always knows how to support, protect, never offend and, perhaps more importantly, he himself never takes offense. In duality, everyone is activated and feels stronger and more right.
There are many articles on duality on our site, they are not only laudatory, but also critical, the links are below.
When understanding a guy, a husband is hard and thankless work.
Naturally, if there are the best psychotypical compatibility, then there are also the worst ones, when mutual understanding is an endless series of problems. These include conflicts. It would be more correct to call conflicting intertype relationships opposite, because the partners participating in these relationships are arranged in the opposite way literally in every position. Therefore, any of the manifestations of the conflicter (statement, action) excites the counterpart and gives rise to a feeling of protest in him. Perhaps only a “toy” conflicter that appears on a movie or television screen will evoke mostly positive feelings: interest, respect - after all, the fact of the partner’s “uncomfortableness”, which is so tangible in life, is leveled.
The dominant function of one conflictor coincides with the most painful zone of the other. If partners do not "feel" each other and do not feel good will for each other, then this is very reminiscent of a situation where two put knives to each other's throats. However, it is the reciprocity of this position that contains a powerful deterrent. Conflicters, as a rule, immediately feel mutual danger, which serves as a good prerequisite for stopping the conflict. Feeling that the scythe has found a stone, only a fool will continue to mow.
That part of the personality of one of the conflicters, in which he "grabs" the situation quite adequately and acts absolutely confidently, for the second one is a house of cards, made up of statements heard or read somewhere. It is clear that in this area the partners are opposite and have every reason to be dissatisfied with each other. It is not difficult to guess that conflicting intertype relationships are included in the group of relationships that are unambiguously unsuitable for marriage.
Content signs of unfavorable marital relations obtained in the studies of V. Matyuz and K. Mikhanovich of families in which tense relations:
1. A significant difference in thinking on many issues and problems;
2. Poor understanding of the feelings of another;
3. They say words that annoy the other;
4. Often feel unloved;
5. Pay no attention to the other;
6. Feel an unmet need for trust;
7. Feel the need for a person who can be trusted;
8. Rarely compliment each other;
9. Forced to often yield to the opinion of another;
10. Wish more love.
Conflicting couples live extremely badly, and although at times relative calm is established and it begins to seem to partners that they have managed to “get used to” each other, this is just the calm before the storm, which marks the brewing of a new explosion that happens with the inevitability of sunrise - with new strength and at the most inopportune moment. Spouses in a conflicting couple are excited, neurotic, embittered, although at the initial stage they experienced a vivid love. This situation can be commented on with the words that are in the song of Alla Pugacheva and Christina:
"How difficult it was for me alone
It is even more difficult for us together ... "
What is it - myth or reality, our ideas about male sexual potential? Find out if it is possible to calculate the sexual characteristics of a man from external data.
Is there a relationship between sexuality and a man's appearance?
Scientists and women are wrestling with this question. There are dozens of myths about this. According to the most common of them, the ardent macho must be bald, have crooked legs and a big nose. But is it so in practice?
Nose
Myth: A large nose is an impressive manhood.
Truth: there is no regularity between the sizes of these parts of the body. However, some influence of the nose on a man's sexuality is still confirmed by otolaryngologists. It turns out that the owners of a large organ of smell usually have a rather pleasant timbre of voice, which hypnotically affects women, and, as you know, they love with their ears. Therefore, such men are more attractive to women.
The conclusion is: the size of the nose is associated only with the external attractiveness of the representative of the stronger sex, and not with his potency and intimate anatomy.
Thumb
Myth: The size and shape of a man's dignity can be understood by appearance his thumb on his hand.
Truth: urologists and women with rich intimate experience partly confirm this myth. If the finger extends towards the nail, the dignity of the man has an impressive head. If a thumb has a narrowing to the nail, the same can be expected from the penis of a man.
Foot size
Myth: 45th foot size - sure sign sexual indefatigability of a man.
Truth: this is an absolute lie. What matters is not the size of the foot, but the length of the entire leg. The shorter the legs of a man in comparison with his height, the more tireless he is in bed. There is a clear physiological rationale for this - an abundance of androgens. Their excess in adolescence inhibits the growth of tubular bones, while the body continues to grow.
The conclusion is: a man with short legs will not let you get bored on your love bed.
Hairiness
Myth: thickets on the body are evidence of a hot temperament.
Truth: excessive shaggyness male body is a clear sign of problems with the adrenal glands. The increased functioning of these glands at a young age leads to early puberty, however, the extinction of the reproductive system will overtake a man much faster.
Despite this, there is a grain of truth in this myth. You need to look not at the chest, arms and back, but at the pubis of a man. The curlyer the hairline leading from the navel to the base of his dignity, the more testosterone a man has - this is a hormone that is responsible for his sexual strength and sexual temperament.
Lysina
Myth: less hair - more sexual power of a man.
Truth: the absence of hair on the head has a vague relation to the sexual temperament. The theory "a bald lover is an excellent lover" is correct, but only if a man began to rapidly lose hair before the age of 30, and the reason for this is not radiation, but increased production of androgens.
Men seek and choose their opposite. Quiet - assertive, self-confident - timid. That is, they are looking for in a partner those qualities that they themselves lack ...
Girls prefer tall ones. And the high ones know their worth and choose, choose. Small men often suffer because of their height and hide it behind external aggressiveness. But the low ones are more adapted to life, to the struggle for survival. And as a result, they are often good husbands.
Men prefer to get acquainted with the beautiful, but they marry more often the most ordinary. There are many beauties among the old maids. When it comes to marriage, a man gives preference to the girl who, in his opinion, will be capable of tenderness, affection, knows how to truly love.
About obedience
It is very important for a man that his chosen one be submissive to him. Then he feels like a man with her. Even in Domostroy, a requirement was laid down for the husband to bring up obedience in his wife. O. Balzac echoes this: "A woman is only truly touching and good when she obeys her master."
And here is the thought of R. Rilke: "To endure is a gift of a woman."
"Men feel bad if a woman looks smarter than him. It degrades him as a leader." A smart woman is the one in whose society you can behave as stupidly as you like" - these words of the French poet and philosopher P. Valery reflect the male point of view.
The desire to surpass a woman, and above all in the mind, is reflected, for example, in the fact that in "male" jokes a woman is often presented as stupid:
The woman in the car turns on the radio and hears: "You are listening to Europa-plus radio!" - "Lord, how do they know that I listen to them ?!"
About personality
Men are attracted by the personality of his chosen one. He should be proud of her, like a trophy hunter. This is greatly facilitated by her ability to do something not only better than him, but also everyone he knows.
The area of this perfection can be anything - jumping into the water, artistic whistling, drawing, dancing, five-story cakes. A woman's self-confidence attracts them more than beauty. As communication progresses, a man begins to appreciate individuality in a woman. Reminds me of the movie Fall in Love. Handsome, played by Yankovsky, falls in love with Vera, an ugly woman, but strong, energetic, persistent.
Psychologists say that when searching for "our half" we subconsciously strive to find a certain type. And there are two confirmations of this.
1) It has been noticed that often girls marry "copies" of their father, and boys marry girls who are somewhat similar to their mother. This similarity can be in the details: the timbre of the voice - and he marries an ugly girl, because she has the same manner of speaking as her mother.
Life story: Once upon a time there was a small, miniature, modest, not very prominent woman. And there was a bachelor, the director of some winery, who had everything he wanted, and decided to get married. He chose for a while, checked, finally met her. And this is what finally determined his choice, as he later said: “I have been living with her for a week now and every day I hear the same thing:“ Oh, coffee ran away again ... ”And I realized that this is my wife, because all my childhood I heard my mother's voice from the kitchen with exactly the same words. And they've been around for 20 years.
2) Why do many who have been married more than once, never found their happiness? Because they choose the same. Identical in the sense of a set of those features that they want to see in their chosen one.
Who do they marry
What comes easily is not appreciated. Girls who easily agree to "go visit" when they see an imported car are not only unable to evoke lofty feelings, they even cease to arouse desire in the strong half. So men are arranged that they need to achieve something everywhere. And how can one be interested, let alone intrigued, by what is known?!
Girls with such behavior do not marry - that's for sure. The stereotype is triggered: "Today you easily went with me, which means that tomorrow you will agree with another."
If you want to get married with an apartment, a car, and other things, remember that the rich have the principle "We don't get cheap things."
If you force him to spend a lot of effort, emotions, nerves, and eventually money on himself, he will never let you go. But first, respect yourself.
Don't be in a hurry to say yes. A hasty "yes" immediately lowers your price. Everyone knows from experience that the feminine "no" means "maybe" and "maybe" means "yes."
instinct and love
Do not confuse the sexual instinct of the "admirer" with love. Attraction is faceless, he almost does not care - this or that.
Instinct formula: "I want to feel good." The formula of love: "I want you to feel good," and only from this desire, when it is mutual, harmony is born: "We feel good."
By the way, did he ask about your family, hobbies, interests? What do you know about him? By the way, did he leave his phone or did he just take yours? What do you even know about him, besides what he "spun"?
First, they love those who love themselves. Do you regularly go to the hairdresser? Do you take care of your face? Are you doing a manicure?
Secondly, "pacifiers" are not interesting to men.
What are you reading? Do you go to the theater or concerts? Do you know about the events in your city, in the country?
What annoys men
Even if men do not tell you about it, they are very annoyed by a woman's casual appearance and her bad habits. As a result of interviews with hundreds of men, this is not a small list of complaints expressed by them against their girlfriends.
First of all, everyone is irritated:
smell from the mouth,
unfashionable and sloppy clothes,
hairy legs,
unshaven armpits,
unhealthy food,
unnatural hair (too frankly dyed or curled, very hard from varnish, etc.),
worn out clothes or shapeless dressing gowns at home,
military gait,
an abundance of jewelry, jewelry,
too loud laugh
sagging body,
bad skin hidden by heavy makeup, stale body odor or its mixture with a strong deodorant,
peeling nail polish,
long nails, blood-colored varnish on them (and even more so green and blue).
Why is all this so important in the art of liking? Because a man is more visually oriented than a woman. "Men love with their eyes." It is very easy for a man to get aroused by a visual stimulus, but it is even easier to be disgusted by what he sees. Despite the fact that women often express the same complaints about men, they step over their complaints much faster, plunging into emotions.
The ideal of femininity
The traditional ideal of "femininity" in the understanding of men: tender, beautiful, soft, affectionate, passive and dependent, allowing a man to feel strong and energetic towards her.
These qualities are still highly valued today and they form the core of the standard of femininity.
Men's secrets
Knowing them makes it easier to communicate with men.
1. Men hate to be wrong, but what men hate the most is when women find out before them that they are wrong.
When a woman suggests doing something differently, he hears in this condemnation: "You are doing it wrong."
It comes from upbringing. Boys are actually taught: "You are good when you did everything well and correctly. And if not, you are bad!" Therefore, the self-esteem of men depends entirely on his achievements.
2. Men hate it when women get upset or nervous. Because he then believes that he must do something. And since the experiences of a woman relate to the inner world, in which a man does not understand, he feels psychological discomfort, discharged by aggression at its source, i.e. on a woman.
To prevent this, it is enough for a woman to help a man by telling him what needs to be done. They perceive words literally, without interpretations and subtexts, in which women are true masters.
3. Men are less interested in love and relationships than women.
Men assert themselves primarily through their work, business, achievements. Women assert themselves through relationships.
The features of the brain activity of a man are such that it is more difficult for them to switch from thoughts to feelings than for a woman. Therefore, if he has trouble at work, he is not up to feelings.
4. Men love to teach and fall in love with those who accept them as teachers. At this, classmates "catch" excellent students, asking after class to explain something "incomprehensible in the abstract."
André Maurois rightly noted:
"Many women have made a brilliant career, being able only to listen, besides, it is not necessary to listen: it is enough to pretend."
5. Although men admire smart women, decisive women leaders, they prefer to create a family with others - with those with whom they feel, at least formally, the head of the family. Therefore, it is better for a woman to hide her leadership qualities in communication with a man whom she has "laid her eyes on".
How to control a man
The need for approval is a drug need, it grows with satisfaction, it is never satisfied.
It is necessary to constantly, fervently, convincingly prove to a man that only he, the only, unique and incomparable, can do whatever he wants, for there is a king and a god. And he will generously repay you, if not with achievements, then with affection. He wants everything you want...
God forbid a woman, addressing a man, use sarcasm, an ironic tone!
Criticism reaches its goal only in the context of relentlessly growing approval: recognize his advantages and merits in advance, give him advances on petty expenses of pride, praise for what he did not do (but, of course, he will do) - and everything will be in order, he will and knight, and housekeeper...
Signs of extreme disapproval - reproaches, tears, tantrums, etc. - should be used only in emergency situations and designed in such a way as to demonstrate female weakness.
Never call a man a diminutive "Cat", "Fish", "Falcon", etc. Better - "You are my knight!"
How to understand that a man wants to please
The man is given "preening gestures". He straightens his tie, cufflinks, jacket, tightens his socks if they have gone down, etc.
Straightens the body, pulls back the shoulders ("chest with a wheel"), moves the chin up and down.
Typical disadvantages of men
The main male flaw, noted by both young and old women, is the self-confidence of men.
Often a man cools off to the object of his passion as soon as he achieves his goal.
A man wants to achieve too much at once. Unlike women, men are not able to fully surrender to love. Therefore, a woman should not be jealous of a man for his hobbies.
And passionate love, for example, a sanguine or choleric person quickly gets bored.
Men get tired of exalted love. (Example: Vronsky and Anna Karenina from L. Tolstoy's novel.)
About beautiful and "ugly" women
The phenomenon of an ugly woman is purely psychological, internal. Because in fact, if a woman is self-confident, she has prosperous parents, she, even being such a "fat Klava", will be pleasant, charming. Women's beauty is not physical qualities. It consists of self-attitude (how much you love yourself and feel ready to be happy) and the ability to present yourself.
Now the attitude towards the category of beauty has changed. If earlier it was something beautiful, harmonious, now it is expressive. One of the famous makeup artists said that the more ugly a woman is, the more interesting she can be made. It is very important to find something expressive in it (eyes, nose, curve of the neck, lip contour) and make it the main accent of the appearance. And eyes. Any woman can have beautiful eyes. In particular, by inserting contact lenses, you can make eyes of any color.
Folk wisdom says: "Do not be born beautiful, but be born happy."
There are no more happy people among the naturally beautiful than among the rest. Beauty can also be a burden. A beautiful woman is not attractive. It is as if she is given the opportunity to choose herself from that modest number of men who curl around her. Here is the opinion of one of the recognized beauties: “This incredible attention of everyone and everyone is very overwhelming, and in the end you cannot make a choice” (she herself was married for the third time, and she did not perceive these three marriages with pride).
The fact that many of them have been married many times speaks about the problems of beauties. This means: many times they experienced disappointment in the chosen one, went through an extremely unpleasant divorce procedure (which, by the way, is one of the strongest health-damaging stresses).
The one who gets married hopes that this is for life. Undoubtedly, those who have changed many husbands would willingly change their fate with those who have lived all their lives with one loved one. The goal of a woman is to be happy. And beauty is, as it were, the easiest way to achieve this. But we must understand that, first of all, a woman should be a sun that radiates warmth. If this is not the case, then sooner or later she becomes ugly and turns into a hag that no one needs. This is the law of nature.
What attracts the male gaze?
Sexologists different countries conducted such a survey. Three women are standing: one is tall, the other is of medium height, the third is graceful, small. As a rule, men first of all look at a woman who, as it were, compensates for their own height: tall like Thumbelina, short - tall, and everyone likes the average. Then, with the help of a hidden camera, glances were recorded at women of average height, who were blondes, brown-haired, brunettes. The same law again: dark-haired people like fair-haired people, and so on. But the proportions of the bodies attract everyone approximately equally.
It just so happens: a man will certainly look at almost every woman. But there is no way to see the WHOLE woman at once; something in it attracts more, something less. According to the Czechoslovak magazine Porcupine, in 24 cases out of a hundred, men first of all pay attention to the eyes of women, and experts believe that this number could be even higher if women did not wear tinted glasses.
In the 1960s, sociological research was carried out. Students, cadets, soldiers and young workers were asked questions like "What do you like most about a woman's appearance?" The answers were as follows: a beautiful figure - 62.5%, a pretty face - 27.5%, etc.
Thirty years have passed. What has changed? The main parameters of attractiveness remained the same, although they became more detailed: beautiful eyes, a smile, lips, etc. stand out on the face.
And how attractive female grace! It is no coincidence that many men fall in love watching a woman dance, how she walks, turns her head, how her hands move in work. Not only the beauty of the body is important, but also the perfect possession of it. How many times have I met beautiful-faced women who immediately lost their attractiveness because they moved awkwardly, were angular, stooped, absurdly waving their arms or sitting in ugly poses. Watch TV shows from European countries. Where do you see a woman who would sit with her knees apart or bent over in three deaths? Disharmonious movements, ignorance of what is beautiful for her, reduces the charm of a woman.
But since we have touched on the comparison of our women with Western Europeans, it is striking that the faces and figures of our women are more attractive. Our female gene pool is amazing!
Other studies
British psychologists have conducted research in several countries on the value scale of men with different temperaments. It turned out that all the discordance of opinion confirms two indisputable facts:
1) there is no friend for the taste and color;
2) for every woman there is a man who likes something in her.
Strengthen your ass
Since, seeing a woman from the back, a man always pays attention to her ass, it is worth trying to make her more attractive.
To this end, experts have developed exercises that we present here.
1. Starting position: stand up, legs apart and straightened. Keeping your back straight and even, do a squat, then make efforts with your buttocks, without lifting your heels off the floor.
2. Starting position: emphasis on elbows and knees. We raise the hips in turn, but in no case above the priests.
3. Starting position: lie on your back, legs bent. We raise the pelvis with a strong retraction of the buttocks, but without lifting the back off the floor.
4. Starting position: stand up, legs on the same line, one foot slightly in front of the other. Lower the "back" leg, placing the knee on the floor and bending the knee of the other leg. Slowly rise, making an effort with the buttocks.
Secrets of self-serve
Even the ten sexiest women of all time didn't have a perfect figure. Often heard from preoccupied women: "I would like to have the figure of Marilyn Monroe (Sharon Stone, Jane Mansfield, Demi Moore, etc.)". But the fact is that none of the listed women can be called physically perfect. Marilyn Monroe had small breasts. Only well-shaped bras and a special cut of the dress gave the impression of a magnificent chest.
If you have big breasts but thick legs, go for seductive see-through dresses, sweaters and blouses that show off your strong points. If you have a flat chest, but divine legs, then instead of dresses with a deep neckline, wear short skirts and elegant women's shoes. Learn to follow fashion, but don't let yourself be enslaved. If you're wearing black this year, wear gold. Just think how much faster he will find you at the party. If green and orange are in fashion, and his favorite color is blue, wear as much blue as possible. Never buy a dress just because it is practical. If you don't feel happy in it, leave it on the shelf.
Before you buy any bright work of sewing art that will fly into your weekly salary, try it on well, sit, look in the mirror, study your reflection. Doesn't it press, doesn't it frown? Does it interfere with movement? Raise your hands: what if the dress is torn when you suddenly throw yourself on his neck? Bend over, do the seams look too tight, like they're about to burst? You won't tempt anyone with clothes that fit. Check which colors suit you and only wear them. Donate that dirty brown dress that makes you look like death to the poor and buy that pink dress that suits you so well.
Work like the devil, trying to emphasize your strengths and hide your flaws. And don't tell me that you have only flaws, it's not!
And one more important landmark: a woman needs to dress in such a way that a man wants to undress her.
Never let a man see you in ugly underwear, and even grabbed with pins.
Cosmetics can become a woman's friend or foe, depending on skill and taste. If you are not sure what you are doing right, seek help from a specialist. Many of the chic beauty salons have consultants. Large department stores also invite cosmetics consultants from time to time. Such experts can advise on how to paint correctly, what tone suits you and how to emphasize beautiful and hide ugly features. A number of magazines publish articles on these issues, and there are several good books. Search the whole city, but find a good hairdresser. Pay him any money and say thank you. Your hairstyle depends on a good haircut, not on a woman who puts three rows of curlers on your head and then stuffs everything under the dryer. If the head is not in order, then no styling will help and you will not be able to look fresh and cheerful after a tiring day.
If your man does not suffer from allergies, then use perfume. However, before you find the right perfume, you will have to experiment, and at the moment when everyone around asks what kind of perfume it is and where you bought it, you will realize that you have found what you need.
Keep your legs in order, check if they are neatly trimmed and if the varnish comes off them. As a rule, men do not like draconian long nails, so before you grow them, check the taste of your partner.
Even if you prefer mess, you need to look neat. No falling bra straps, holey stockings, frayed gloves
What attracts and repels a man?
Men are exclusively attracted to women's self-confidence. But only in moderation. A self-confident woman causes irritation to a greater extent than a self-confident man. If a woman's body is far from perfect, her positive self-esteem and confidence in her own body will make her no less attractive.
Much of what is repulsive to men stems from a woman's low self-esteem if she does not consider herself attractive and shows such an attitude towards herself (poor posture, obvious overweight, flabby muscles and lack of self-esteem).
Men are attracted to women who show their interest in them - but without undue zeal.
Some women try very hard to be sexy, and this diligence repels men. Excessive aggressiveness, importunity, as well as excessive materialism will very soon scare away a man.
Bad habits repel men immediately, and among them, men single out smoking and cravings for alcoholic beverages.
Poor choice of dresses, jewelry, perfumes convey negative impulses. Sometimes a woman puts up with a minor flaw or defect in appearance, which is easily eliminated with the help of a dentist or dermatologist. Bad teeth, flaws in the face or hair, of course, prevent a woman from being liked.
Men do not like overly businesslike, capricious, prudent, mercenary and vulgar women.
Vulgar or cheap behavior is repulsive. Men do not like loud, shrill voices, foul language, frankly provocative clothes.
Usually men prefer a sophisticated approach, saying that a woman "should be soft and elusive", "should be able to captivate imperceptibly." Sexy women instinctively understand this and admit that they rarely use frank, provocative sexuality.
On an instinctive level, a man wants to make sure that his partner does not answer him aggressively. Therefore, humility attracts, and aggressive "body language" repels.
Success also enhances attractiveness, and when a woman is successful at work, this often translates through her mood, giving her a special charm.
Personal flaws - some of which cannot be dealt with - can reduce attractiveness. One of the huge disadvantages is laziness, which enslaves a woman.
Work on yourself
Up to 20 years, beauty is a gift of nature, at 25 - luck, after 30 - work, after 35 - hard work.
Your hairstyle should make a man want to run his fingers through his hair, inhale their scent. You don't have to spend a lot of time on your hair. For most women, things will go better with men if they mess with her less.
Here are some practical tips.
1. Avoid extravagance if you are not looking for a man who loves extremes. Don't look like a "punk".
2. Don't cut your hair too short. Let your hair be at least as long as your thumb.
3. If you use hairspray, don't use strong-smelling, sticky, or stiff hairspray.
4. Make sure your hair looks soft and not brittle.
5. If your hair has begun to turn gray, choosing the right color will help make it more beautiful. Most men don't like White hair because they age a woman. If you dye your hair, do it all the time so that the roots don't show. Black roots, for example, spoil the appearance of dyed blondes.
Decorations
If you're looking for a man, avoid rings until you find him, a watch is the only piece of jewelry you can wear on your hand. You do not need bracelets, as they reduce the desire of a man to caress your hands.
Earrings can also be a nuisance, especially if they draw attention away from your hair. Small earrings are preferred over large ones.
One last thing about jewelry: cheap jewelry is cheap. It looks only on little girls, but not on adult women. If you are already wearing jewelry, then it must be a real thing. Or nothing.
Forget about growing long nails. For many men, they only mean that you are not inclined to do housework and not a company for active, active recreation. In addition, you may inadvertently scratch a man, which is very annoying for them.
Food particles between the teeth, especially the front ones, are highly undesirable. Visit the dentist regularly, close all hollows with fillings. Insert dentures if necessary. It is advisable to insert not gold or silver teeth, but closer to natural - ceramic. It is advisable to brush your teeth after every meal.
Cosmetics
Better not to use it at all. But if you already use it, then remember: the main thing is not to overdo it!
Your face should look pleasing to kiss. A man won't like touching your cheek if it's hardened with powder and cream underneath. Do not draw circles around the eyes. If you paint your lips, then you must be sure that the lipstick does not stain.
It is better not to use them, as they give too strong a smell. Take toilet water or cologne. The right smell, in addition, helps to make a career. This is the opinion of 36% of those holding leadership positions.
Excess weight
A few extra pounds are unlikely to lead to a break in relations. You are more likely to lose a man by being overly carried away by a diet, especially if the latter comes to self-torture.
However, if your weight is greater than the value obtained by the formula:
height (in cm) minus 100 (kg),
then it is very necessary to lose those extra pounds.
Do not wear too ordinary or, conversely, extravagant glasses.
Do not wear mirrored, tinted, prismatic and other glasses that hide your eyes - a man should be able to see them.
Beauty secrets of Catherine Deneuve
Catherine Deneuve, who is already over fifty, still remains for most French people - and not only for them - the most beautiful woman in the world. Nevertheless, in conversations with journalists, she usually refuses to answer questions that my colleagues sometimes unceremoniously ask about her appearance, expressing her admiration with phrases like: "How young you look, however, in life!"
"It's not enough to have good skin - you have to be able to maintain it. The most important thing I did for this was to quit smoking 10 years ago in the United States with the help of hypnosis. I constantly monitor my skin and never expose my face to the sun. The fact that I have it it looks tanned, it's a hoax! A dermatologist told me: "It's better to lie than to have your skin lose two years of life because of two months of sunburn." Skin must be looked after "from the inside."
I use makeup sparingly. The most important thing in this matter is the eyebrows and mouth, which determine the expression of the entire face. I don’t paint my eyelids - except perhaps with a golden-beige color. I am interested in the composition of cosmetics, where again I prefer Yves Saint Laurent, using, in particular, his hydroactive mask.
I am not so much into sports as I strive to lead a healthy and active lifestyle. I love to walk. To stay in good physical shape, I do gymnastics with a group of women. I spend weekends outside the city, where I go to the sauna, which helps to cleanse the body, and in particular the skin. This Nordic ritual has become a habit for me.
In addition, I try to sleep at least 8 hours a day. Sleep is an indispensable thing for preserving beauty.
After a vacation, you always have to go on a diet. Of course, I never eat desserts - although I adore them - and I do without sugar. Between meals I drink a lot of water, but at the table I prefer to drink a glass of wine.
Before the start of the next filming, I arrange a fasting day for myself - I drink only vegetable broth or fruit juices. I eat little meat, I prefer fruits.
Today it is important - and fashionable - to look natural, and not to decorate yourself with all sorts of artificial things. But such a natural look does not come by itself, but requires a lot of time and work. Growing up - I prefer this word to the word "aging" - you must, without stopping, take care of your skin and use little makeup. To be frank, being beautiful and in good shape requires a lot of effort."
Record your voice on a tape recorder and listen to yourself. Are you happy? Ask people you trust (but don't " best friends"who will never wish you to become better than them), whether such a voice is liked by men.
If after that there is a desire to improve your voice, contact the appropriate specialist who will advise you on a set of exercises to smooth out voice defects.
Is the game worth the candle? Without any doubt.
If, when talking on the phone, your voice makes him want to see you immediately, isn't that a victory? Please note that all sex stars have voices no less interesting than their appearance. Marilyn Monroe had a memorable gentle breathy whisper. Sophia Loren has a strong velvety voice. The gentle voice of Elizabeth Taylor inspires passion. They learned it. You, too, can have a distinctive alluring voice if you only want to, and you should want to.
What should be to please men
Love the one you love with all your heart and trust him.
Do not argue with him, but with him with others, appearance, especially with everyone.
Instill in him confidence in his strength, as well as in his nobility, in his diligence, generosity and love for you.
Be gentle with him and repeat more often that you love him, that no one will ever love him like you will.
Never blame him for anything. Instead of reproach, in rare cases, cry, without sobbing, as if trying to hide tears.
If he wants to kiss you, kiss him joyfully and with pleasure, and so on.
Do not forget to tell him that intimacy with him gives you pleasure, which did not happen with others, if he knows that others were.
Don't be rough with him. Be light and flexible.
Never tell him about your former lovers and do not ask him about anything, do not attach exaggerated importance to his "betrayals".
Be interested in his business, his profession, emphasizing that you put his business above all else, relegating your own business to the background. Ask him, ask for advice, ask for an explanation.
Tell him that you adore his parents, especially his mother.
Give them, especially her, signs of attention.
Give him the opportunity to be without you from time to time.
Never lose your self-respect, do not run after a man.
Try to be in a good mood with him, laugh and smile more often, especially when he is sharp.
Never flirt with anyone in front of him and do not give the slightest reason for harshness. It is very dangerous.
Do not try to seem smarter than him, let him see that you are independent, but that it is he who is your support and strong shoulder.
Take gifts and money from him cheerfully, with gratitude, with great pleasure, so that he sees it, even if you do not like the gift.
Know how to cook deliciously, but do not force him to eat, let alone drink.
Avoid men who are stupid, stingy, loafers and drunkards.
Remember that you are a woman and that there is no point in wasting time on an insensitive chump.
You won't be forced to be nice.
Feel free to switch.
Settings
Difficult? Yes, not easy. But being happy is work.
A woman who has unkind attitudes towards the masculine gender is doomed to lovelessness and inattention. With such views, even a beauty cannot charm a man. Women, if they want to be charming, it is useful to learn simple truths. Love dies if a woman begins to think that she is the most important thing in her. Love requires absolute honesty and fidelity. Love is killed by claims. Love is destroyed by dishonest thoughts and harsh words.
In general, to charm is to love another more than yourself. And then any man will follow you to the ends of the world. Real men have one "weakness": they do not betray love, for them it is the same as betrayal of the Fatherland. In Ossetia they say: "The hand of the giver takes." Love and take.
Always on the lookout
All of the above leads to the conclusion that a woman should always be in shape, take care of herself at any moment, in other words, always see herself through the eyes of a man. In some cultures, such attitudes are reflected in the rules of the relationship between men and women. For example, a Japanese man has the right to demand a divorce if his wife sleeps ugly. So Japanese girls are taught to sleep in positions that meet certain aesthetic requirements.
The evolution of concepts of beauty
At the dawn of mankind, the concepts of beauty were purely utilitarian: legs are long - it means that she runs fast; relief muscles - physically strong, able to protect; a woman's large breasts - babies will be full; wide hips - will give birth well.
Civilization has changed the idea of beauty as a thing "useful in the household". The leaders got money, and they wanted something special, maybe not very necessary, but to be. And no one else had.
In countries with a warm climate that allows you to be naked without fear of freezing, a cult of a beautiful body has appeared. Classic example - Ancient Greece and a little later Rome.
However, what was beautiful in the time of Homer does not look like it now. Remember copies from old sculptures. Remarkably regular faces of women, and then plump arms, small breasts, a wide waist, smoothly turning into powerful hips ... Therefore, now, in the late 90s, the phrase "you have a classic antique beauty" does not always sound like a compliment.
The notion of female beauty has been around for a long time, much longer than "sexuality". Simply because sexuality has not always been flattering for a woman. With the advent of Christianity, spiritualized beauty began to be valued, having little in common with sinful earthly joys. Golden curls, blue eyes and white skin without a blush, a thin short figure, childish forms - Madonna! ..
What associations most often arise in the majority with the words "passionate woman"? A burning brunette with a powerful bust, and not at all a frigid blonde. The Middle Ages became famous for burning sexual "witches" at the stake. In paintings and frescoes, as well as in the literature of that time, witches are not only old women, but also young girls with black hair, having unbridled sex with goat-legged monsters.
According to church concepts, sex is a "sin". You can do it only after the wedding in the church, on strictly defined days (by the way, according to the Catholic standards of that time, there were barely thirty days a year when it was "possible"). Accordingly, a somewhat unhealthy type of female beauty began to be cultivated - a high forehead (and to make it seem even higher, the hair on the forehead was shaved, it was customary to be proud of bald patches), narrow shoulders and a sunken chest. At the Spanish court, girls were even tied with heavy plates on their chests so that it remained in its infancy. The peasants, on the contrary, were broad-boned, tanned, women with lush, strong forms. Some rural beauties even nursed small calves if the cow died or was taken away.
The clothes of that time could not emphasize the sexuality of either men, let alone women. Long robes, in women they expanded from the chest, high hats and scarves, in which they wrapped their faces. We won’t even talk about knights - an iron mask instead of a face is now associated only with the cannibal Hannibal Lecter from The Silence of the Lambs, and certainly not with eroticism.
The Renaissance is trying to move away from painfully perverted sexuality (by the way, it was in the Middle Ages that sadomasochism flourished, there were all conditions for this). Gradually, women begin to undress. And what will you show if there is a neckline, but no bust? And in vogue is rearing chest and narrow waist. No bald patches - wigs hide both the lack of hair and the errors of the hairstyle. XVII-XVIII centuries are very playful and erotic. At the royal courts, freedom of morals is glorified, which is reflected in the increased birth rate of illegitimate children.
The end of the 19th century marked the beginning of emancipation. No - sexuality! A woman is equal to a man! At the beginning of the 20th century, skirts were shortened, for the first time (!) Women tried to wear trousers, thin-legged, flat-chested and short haircuts were in fashion. For both sexes, cigarettes and high speeds are becoming fashionable. True, there are cases when girls trying to appear in cool restaurants in trousers were simply thrown out into the street and called various bad words. Pants on a woman ceased to shock society only by the end of the twenties.
The 20th century is a crazy century. Firstly, the thinness of the arms and legs and their immeasurable length and thinness are kept and kept in fashion. Already the end of the century, and the silhouette of a fashionable woman has not changed much compared to its beginning. Only the forms have become a little more magnificent. If in the 18th century ladies had to go to terrible tricks with corsages, corsets and the like, now they put in a silicone gasket and flaunt in a tight T-shirt as much as they like.
But there comes a time when you get tired of the abundance of naked magnificent breasts, and then a female girl comes to replace. Such, for example, is Kate Moss. Having starred naked in an advertisement for Calvin Klein, she brought a storm of protests to the poor fashion designer - people did not understand that this girl had long been an adult, and not at all a representative of child pornography.
However, experts say that excessive nudity, which the 20th century sins so much, does not lead to any increase in sex appeal. When a man has the opportunity to think, to dream about something, it excites him much more than simple contemplation: here they are, legs, take them - I don’t want to. Therefore, fashion designers are constantly trying to return to long skirts (but with slits), to closed dresses (but with cutouts in the most unexpected places), to complex lace underwear.
seducers
It happens that she lost her head, fell in love, was seduced, believed the promises. Anything happens. But do not despair. Relationships with men require experience. And experience comes through trial and error.
However, it is impossible to build something useful, harmonious, lasting on mistakes alone. Remember the well-known wisdom: "I was deceived once - let him be ashamed, I was deceived a second time - let me be ashamed!" It's time to learn to evaluate the intentions of men by the age of 20.
If they want another adventure, then most often they follow the pattern: “Oh, how beautiful (smart, charming, noble) you are!”, “All my life I dreamed of finding such a woman (all others are not interesting to me, all others are not smart, all others are impudent, all...)". In a word, you are exceptional, and he immediately saw it, submissive and begging for attention: “I am at your feet!”, “I am suffering, I am going crazy, I beg you, stay with me for at least another minute (we will look at the museum, we will go to a restaurant, to the theatre, let's sit in the park, etc.)".
Then again cheap compliments or sighs, or even self-promotion: I'm so good, you can't go wrong in choosing a friend. Then kisses (many start with this!). If it came to kissing, then everything that is said after that is a lie to seduce another fool completely. The courting seeks solitude, followed by drinking, passionate kisses and it's over: you are bought with gross flattery, feigned attention, money, promises, or all of these together.
If, after the first intimacy, the second, third, etc., immediately went on, this means only one thing for a man: you are a typical silly, provincial, or even simply depraved. They don't get married like that.
Every time your attention is clamored for by another applicant, analyze what you most attract him to and what repels him. And hone your charm. And if you are already parting, ask directly: "Tell me honestly: why did it not work out anyway? How did I push you away?" Let at least sincerity in this be the price for deceived hopes.
And one more piece of advice: of course, one must be careful, one must avoid casual acquaintances and convulsive passions. However, don't waste your time. Otherwise, you will then have to wait for years until the man you are interested in divorces, or beat him off from another woman. Remember that a man's perseverance has a limit: after 6-8 refusals, he will stop seeking you. And don't pay too much attention to looks, because business qualities and decency is most valuable. Being picky can leave you overlooking perhaps the only worthwhile candidate. Try to solve all the problems before the age of 25. Over the years, your search will become more difficult. You will be left with sissies, divorced men, angry with a failed marriage or people disappointed in women.
